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Freda
in Hungary

My greatest hero story began when I woke up after having an abortion. The decision to end my pregnancy at that time was not easy and terribly painful. I got pregnant after a one- nightstand that happened at a Valentine’s day party, he was truly charming, a Spanish guy from Canary islands. After our night together we kept in touch through a friend of mine who was his flat mate, we hanged out a couple of times before I came to realize I was pregnant with his child. When I told him the news he was as supportive as he could be, but from the start he said, “no problem, it is early and we can fix it.” Then he helped me find out how the abortion should happen, we discussed about it as if we were about to go on holiday. We thought about options in case we could not get the procedure done in Hungary, options like 5 days in Barcelona or a weekend in Austria. At that time I tried to be strong not to develop romantic feelings for him and to keep in mind this is a mistake, we will fix it because it is for the best. Of course, there where days when I cried and had fantasies about running away to Mexico to raise the baby alone in a small town. What stopped me was the single thought of what I expected and wanted in reality for my family to look like. I wanted my children to grow up in a loving house with a couple that cares about each other as parents. I always had dreams about a great love story, how could I give them all up? How could I go through the procedure “abortion” to pay the price to keep trying to build that beautiful family life I truly desire?

 

Happenings happened and I grew brave enough to go through the abortion, it happened in Hungary, no need to go on a strange holiday. When I woke up after the procedure I knew something had changed forever, that harsh ending brought a strong beginning for the rest of my life. I learned from my true wishes, I discovered the huge meaning that family has for me. I stopped involving in life activities that did not bring me closer to living a fulfilling life. I stopped searching for validation through meaningless sex encounters. I became aware of my real needs and focused on them. I found a job that could help me grow and create a strong financial base to start building the life I wanted.  I got to work.  I reached for my friends and started showing them how much they mean to me. I got a second residence permit that allowed me to find real love and partnership a few months later in this country I love so much.  I built a relationship, I created partnership, I have been growing love ever since. I have come incredibly far from that day, I got my BA Degree, which I could afford to pay because of my job, I am in a beautiful relationship and starting a family, happily pregnant and proud of paying the doctor's bill. I am waking up every day in a house filled with love and care.  I am joy and feel blessed. I embrace my past and honor the decisions made. I feel I could use one of Batman’s quotes to give closure and describe my type of hero:

 “I am whatever Gotham needs me to be”.

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